GoonBlog.com

Hockey fight blog with humorous, blow-by-blow commentary on goons, enforcers and donnybrooks

Hockey fight blog with humorous, blow-by-blow commentary on goons, enforcers and donnybrooks.

Dear DVR, I love you.


in Uncategorized

Dear DVR,

Thank you DVR for offering me a convenient way to record matinee Bruins games when I am working. Especially when the Bruins decide they are going to win a game, and have a fight. Without you DVR, I would not be able to see the Travis Moen (ANA) vs. Dan LaCoutre (BOS) fight. I have not yet had time to watch the game, but it is nice to know you will be saving it until space is needed DVR. I would also like to thank you for letting me fast forward though all the boring parts. You know, Rob Simpson’s mindless drivel (by the way, who does he have nude pictures of? He is HORRIBLE!) Commercials, the actual hockey, allowing me to avoid questions from MOL like, "Didn’t they play this yesterday?" and "Why are you watching this if you know who wins." Thank you DVR for allowing me to watch one game tonight on Center Ice, while recording another. That way I have better odds of getting a decent scrap on television. Thank you for letting me save until I decide when to delete. Currently Slap Shot is on save until I delete status. Sometimes it’s too hard to get up and open the DVD and all. Thank you DVR for making this hockey season enjoyable. When I get bummed out because fighting is down, I can look to you and recorded games with fights for a smile. Thank you DVR, I love you.

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NHL Pay Or AHL Play?


in AHL, Chris, Colton Orr, Goons, Jesse Boulerice

I read an article the other day about Hurricanes enforcer Jesse Boulerice, and how he has played in 18 of 36 games for Carolina, and hadn’t had a fight since November 16th. It went on to say that 71% of all NHL games this season have been fight free. That is up from the 59% of fight free games the last time the NHL played. That stat itself is a whole topic on its own. At any rate, it got me to thinking about the role of the enforcer. I sort of thought they’d be a dying breed at the NHL level, but fighting seems to be alive and well in the AHL and below. So I ask you this: Would you rather stay at the NHL, not play and collect an NHL paycheck every two weeks? Or, would you rather go down to the farm, not make as much money, but play every day?

Last year during the AHL Playoffs, the Providence Journal did a story on then P-Bruin tough guy Colton Orr. They were saying how he was all over the ice. How he played in every situation, and how he didn’t take anything off the table. This about Colton Orr. Would you ever see Orr on a NHL power play? Not unless the rest of the team was dead you wouldn’t. Guys like Orr, and Boulerice can play in every situation in the AHL, but are a scratch most nights in the show. When was the last game Orr played for the Rangers? Does anyone know?

Orr and Boulerice are just two guys that come to mind. I am sure if I thought about it, there are probably 10 more guys. Which brings me back to the question, do you get paid, or do you want to play? Would you prefer to skate in practice and sit in the press box, or be sent down to the AHL, and play every night. Keep in mind, you may not play in the NHL, but you do get the NHL pay. Down on the farm, you draw an AHL salary. If it’s me, I want to play. I would want to play all the time in a competitive capacity, than skate in practice, and watch the games. Granted, the money is way less, but if you go down and work hard, there is always the chance to go back up. I’m interested in the opinion of the forum on this one. Drop the gloves, and get in the fray.

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Hockey’s Halfway Point


in Dave, GoonSquad

ESPN’s Scott Burnside chimes in with a good read marking the absolute middle of the season. What if they were to dole out trophies this weekend as opposed to the end of the season? Who would be on the receiving end of the recognition? Have a look at some of Scooter’s midterm grades, including hat tips to:

– Bryan McCabe’s ‘monster’ year in Toronto.
– Joe Thorton’s strong season despite the "WTF?!" moment we recently endured here in Beantown.
– The rookie race that is Crosby vs. Ovechkin.
– Mike O’Conell and Craig Patrick’s heated competition for the "Change the Sheets" award. Can you guess why I am calling it that?

Will Joe-Joe breathe new life into the Sharks? How long can the Rangers continue to dominate? Can Kovalchuk leave Jagr in the dust? 5 Bruins games, 2 Lockmonsters games and 1 BU game so far under my belt. And there’s really lots of ice time left – I am so, so thankful, but so, so broke. Ah, screw it. Goon ‘er up.

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Steve Downie – The Super-Pest.


in Goons, Steve Downie, The Ref

You know you’ve established yourself when you start to get comment-spam. I’m deleting ’em as quickly as I catch ’em, people. It’s almost flattering though. And enough with the penis enlargement ads, you spamming bastards. Who the hell have you been talking to?

David and Goliath – Downie and Malkin. No relation to Gord, the Super-Pest helped Canada in their 5-0 pimp-slap of the Russians, as you may or may not know. I don’t watch a lot of World Junior Hockey. In fact, I’ve never watched any. But Downie’s performance, spunk and grit reeks of a little Goon in the making.

Steve Downie World Junior Hockey

…Downie and Khudobin were chirping back and forth, an exchange that ended when Downie took his glove off and held up four fingers."He was saying something, I couldn’t understand him," said Downie. "I know it must have been good, so I just gave him the four-goal symbol. He didn’t say anything after that."

Technically he’s a promising star right winger – but Goon, as we like to bestow the title, can be about the ‘tude too. My Grandmother would call Downie, "cheeky", probably right before driving to his hometown of Newmarket for some gravestone rubbings. But regardless, if he were a little taller and heavier Steve would undoubtedly be a bonafide bruiser-to-be. And then there’s that silly little habit he has of attacking his teammates.

The rules have changed in the NHL (literally) and little Stevie could be a slugging star in Philly (by way of being kicked off the Windsor Spitfires) if he can get past all the cross-checking in the head nonsense. This tournament win may have redeemed his tattered reputation, has definitely ensured him a chance at the show, and I suppose we’ll see where the bugger ends up. Be it the Flyers or be it anger management counseling. It’s Friday night and I’m rambling. Have a great weekend, everyone.

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New Year, New Goonblog


in Uncategorized

Happy New Year! I hope everyone had a safe and Happy New Year. I myself, drank too much at the Patriots game New Year’s Day, and then drank waaaaaaaaay to much at the Bruins game the next day. In my defense, drinking was the only entertainment, as the B’s lost 1-0 in what could only be described as the anti barn burner of the year. I have watched grass grow that was more entertaining. In the spirit of the New Year, I have a couple of Resolutions.

1. I resolve to write more. I have been slacking, and I have no excuse.

2. I resolve to go deeper. I have noticed more fights in the last couple of weeks. I want to know why. I will share my theories, and not just have re-caps.

3. I resolve to keep it interesting. Again, I don’t want this to be a fight re-cap site. I want this to be as much about entertainment, as fights.

4. I resolve to keep evolving. Dave and I have a shit load of ideas. We need to apply them.

That’s just a few. There are more, but I don’t want to turn this into a Dr. Phil episode. Trust me. The less we get into my psyche, the better! Happy New Year!

{ 13 Comments }

Christmas December 28th?


in Uncategorized

Merry Christmas Lowell fans! Uber Pussy, and underachiever without Eric Stall and Chuck Kobasew, Colin Forbes has been shipped back to Washington for Stephen Peat. Yeah, you read that right. The Lowell Lockmonsters have a true heavyweight for the first time since Trevor Gillies wore a Monsters uniform a few years back. I can only hope that the hand problems that have plagued Peat for much of his career are behind him, and he can crack some skulls for the fight starved Lowell fans. I am not sure if he’ll dress tonight against Providence. If there are fire works, I will update you all. Merry Christmas!

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I Still Owe That Guy One!


in Uncategorized

First off, a very Merry Christmas to all! I am hoping Santa is nice to you all.

I was looking over transactions the other day, when I saw Brad Norton had signed with Binghamton in the AHL. The very next day he had a fight. It reminded me of the time that I fought him in a Men’s League. Well, more accurately, he used my face as a punching bag in a Men’s League.

I don’t remember exactly when it was, but it was the early ’90’s. I was playing for some horrible team, and Norton was playing for the best team in the league. They were killing us. I think it was 256-1. Seriously, it was that bad. Near the middle of the third period, I’m trying to skate my lane, and let time run off the clock. No more, no less. One of my guys got buried from behind down low in the corner. It was a wicked cheap shot, and was totally uncalled for. The guy that got hit, jumped up, and got the gloves off. That’s where it all started. Next thing you know, everyone is in on it, sticks down, gloves off. I was at the top of the face-off circle, when I see this guy trying to get into the fray. Now, I didn’t exactly see who it was, and I didn’t care. I dropped my gloves, and grabbed him. He turns around and his gloves come off. It is at this point I said, and I think it was out loud, "Oh shit, I got the wrong fucking guy!" I was committed so I couldn’t stop there. I tried to get my hands up, but Brad’s reach did me in. He starts unloading on me with a series of rights that felt like cannon balls. I lost track after 5 shots to the noggin. Apparently, I can take a punch, because I was still on my feet. After about 5 or 6 bombs from Norton, I start saying "Brad, Brad, Brad! Don’t you think you’ve had enough!?" He and I knew each other a little bit from playing against each other as kids. He let me go, and I went to the ice. He was standing over me laughing, and I was trying to not look hurt. I would hazard to say, it may have been the most one sided fight in history. So, to all those guys in the AHL, watch out for this kid’s right. Merry Christmas all!

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Thoughts and Prayers


in Uncategorized

In my opinion, the top three hockey players of all time looks like this.

1. Bobby Orr

2. Gordie Howe

3. Wayne Gretzky

It was widely reported all weekend when 99 took a leave of absence from his coaching duties with Phoenix to attend to his mother. I had no idea, the situation was as grave. Mrs. Gretzky died today from lung cancer. Love or hate Gretzky, the pain of losing a parent, can only be matched by losing a child. The thoughts and prayers of the entire hockey world will be with the Gretzkys this holiday season.

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Once Were Warriors.


in Dave

First things first. Where the heck is everybody? Chris? Hammer? Has the New NHL put you guys to sleep or what? We have a damn blog to run here. I know you’ve expressed disdain and disgust for the Bruins thus far, but there’s a few other teams, eh? I can’t really talk, and I won’t make lame excuses. Let’s get the momentum going, boys. This is embarassing.

I’ve recently wondered if we picked the wrong year to start a site dedicated to hockey enforcers. If it weren’t for bad timing, I’d have no timing at all, it seems. It would appear that Todd Simpson of the Blackhawks is having similar inklings:

Todd Simpson BlackHawks Fight

"Hockey players used to be warriors. Now you don’t have to be a warrior.”

What, praytell, do you have to be then? A gazelle? A giraffe on skates? Perhaps past-sell-date Olympic speed skaters will have a new lease on life in the NHL. I’ll tell you though, I’m not too worried. Every NHL and AHL game I’ve been to this year has had a dust up of some sort. It’s not like the boys are playing with bow ties and teacups. I went to the BC/BU contest 2 weeks ago, and even there I saw plenty of hooking and slashing. There’s no reason to panic, and I won’t be lining up for Red Sox Tickets anytime soon.

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Love Train out of Lowell


in Mitch Love, Uncategorized

I am hearing from very reliable sources, that Lowell Lockmonster Defenseman, Mitch Love, is trying to get clearance from the Colorado Avalanche to have season ending hip surgery. From what I am hearing, they want to do the surgery as early as this week. If this is true, Love will be out for the season, but could possibly return for the playoffs. Although, the way Lowell is playing right now, I bet they are out of the playoffs come March.

I wonder if it is the pain in his hip that has caused his fight numbers to come way down. I watched him turn down Trevor Gillies and Kip Brennan last night on a couple of occasions. He’s probably better off not fighting either one of those AHL Heavies, but in the situations when he was asked, I feel he should have dropped em. I know Love has turned down Gillies before. Maybe he just wants no part of him, bad hip or no. Anyway, as I get more news, I’ll keep you posted.

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